inqk.net

It’s 2010.

Are you kidding me?

I rather like Japan. Some of my best friends are Japanese. My wife is Japanese (probably should have written that one first). I’ve lived and worked in Japan for two and half years and deeply admire many aspects of the society.

Today I saw the film 夕凪の町、桜の国 (Yūnagi City, Sakura Country). The film follows the life of a family and the way in which the atomic bombing of Hiroshima affects their lives, from the 1950s until the present. I enjoyed the movie a great deal.

Still, it was hard to watch the film without thinking that it was yet another movie exploring the effects of the atomic bombings of 1945 (albeit one that pays attention to the discrimination against those who survived the attack). It’s easy, particularly for an outsider, to feel as if the Japanese are obsessed with the events of August 6 and August 9. Without a doubt the bombings were horrific. I consider the attack on Nagasaki, especially, to constitute an indefensible war crime.

And yet it was hardly the only war crime. The atrocities committed by the Japanese Imperial Army are well-documented, even if not to the same extent of their fellow Axis powers in Europe. Unfortunately, this is not a topic that gets the same attention in Japanese cinema as the devastation of defeat. If Japanese movies were you only guide, it’d be easy to think World War II was some sort of event where Japan didn’t do much until out of nowhere an American plane dropped an A-bomb.

It’s also easy to start getting defensive as a foreigner. Why don’t the Japanese own up to their responsibility? Why isn’t there the same amount of time spent discussing Nanjing as there is discussing Nagasaki? Or the Burmese Railway? The truth is that even in spite of my connection to Japan I find it hard not to get annoyed.

Sometimes when you’re annoyed, you tend to get wrapped up in your own victimhood. Occasionally you stop and think: Westerners sure spend a lot of time talking about September 11. Why don’t we own up to our responsibility? Why isn’t there the same amount of time spent discussing Nablus as New York? Or our support for corrupt regimes that suit our interests?

I guess because that’s hard.

This is the problem with themes.

When you’ve tweaked a theme to within an inch of its life it’s hard to let it go. This was what happened with Hemingway. I’d spent so long making it mine that the thought of throwing all of that way was too high a barrier to switching. It took a loss of inspiration (that I perhaps erroneously blamed on the theme itself) to finally get me to make a break.

The problem is that now that I’ve made a break I have none of the inhibitions against doing it again. In other words, I’ve become a theme slut.

While it’s been three months since I switched to Old Popular Yolk, I came across a theme today called Manifest. What can I say? It was love.

I love the design of the new Foreign Affairs website. They have this little thing where they use Flash to render the headlines of their articles. I realise we’re all supposed to hate Flash but it looks so nice. They’ve got just the right amount of line-spacing and even though articles are spread out across multiple pages, the advertising is tasteful enough that I don’t mind seeing it again.

In fact, I love the design of the new Foreign Affairs website so much I decided I’d subscribe to the magazine. They have a paywall in place and I was getting frustrated at not being able to read what sounded like the most interesting articles. Also, I don’t believe there’s some magical money-making machine that ensures good writing gets paid for. So I thought, you know what? I’ll do it. I’ll subscribe.

If you live in the U.S., a subscription to Foreign Affairs magazine costs US$32. If you live outside of North America you pay US$32 for a subscription and US$35 for delivery.

I suppose we shouldn’t be surprised. Printing is cheap these days and Australia is a long way from the United States. And US$67 is hardly the end of the world. But I don’t like paying for things I don’t need and I didn’t want the printed version of Foreign Affairs; I just wanted to be able to access the website. Surely something could be done. I thought my question was pretty straightforward:

Hi

I’m not sure who the right person to ask is. I’d like to subscribe to Foreign Affairs but I live in Australia.

The main reason that I want to subscribe is to have full access to the website. To subscribe with an Australian address will cost more in shipping than the cost of the subscription itself (currently US$35 v US$32).

Is it possible only to subscribe at the US price and simply not have the physical magazine shipped to me?

Cheers

Michael.

This was the response:

Ms. Camilleri,

We do not offer kindle subscription. Please contact Amazon.com for further assistance. If we can be of any other assistance, please let us know.

Thank you for subscribing to Foreign Affairs.

Sincerely,

Pete Stone Email Customer Service

Stellar job there, Pete. In three lines you managed to call me a girl, tell me to go and ask someone else for help subscribing to your magazine and then thank me for subscribing when my question was about how I could subscribe.

Still, I kept my cool:

Dear Pete

I’m not actually after a Kindle subscription; what I’d like to know is if there is some way to subscribe without having the magazine sent to Australia. I presume I could simply put a U.S. address in and send my issues to someone else but, in the interests of saving paper, I thought perhaps it would be possible to subscribe and simply have the magazine not sent.

Cheers

Michael.

The response:

Ms. Camilleri,

We are sorry, we do not offer digital subscriptions. If you wish to avail only a online subscription and no print version, please contact amazon.com.

Thank you for your interest in Foreign Affairs.

Sincerely, Scott Shelton Email Customer Service

Two things: (1) Seriously, when did Michael become a woman’s name? (2) What is it with you guys and Amazon?

I realise there’s a danger at extrapolating from personal experience. What happened to me is possibly a one-off. Certainly it’s not the cause of the decline in print media. But it’s hard not to see it as emblematic of a struggle for companies to adjust to the idea that people might want to pay for the content without the dead trees.

Work recently provided me with a Blackberry Bold, and while some things about it are really cool, some things remind you how shitty phones are.

People complain about the fascist-like App Store Apple runs for the iPhone but sometimes the level of frustration you experience with other phones makes you beg to be put into eternal bondage to Cupertino.

Here’s the conversation I would have had with my Blackberry if it were a person.

Me: Hi.

BB: Hi.

Me: I’d like to be able to type in Japanese on my Blackberry Bold. Can I type in other languages?

BB: Sure.

Me: OK, cool. How do I do that?

BB: You can change your input language while typing messages by pressing ALT-ENTER.

Me: OK. I’d like to change to Japanese.

BB: You can change to –

• English (United Kingdom)
• English (United States)
• Chinese (Simplified)
• Chinese (Traditional)
• Korean
• Thai

Me: I want to change to Japanese.

BB: You can’t.

Me: Why not?

BB: Because you don’t have the Japanese input pack installed.

Me: Oh, OK. How do I install it?

BB: You need to download it.

Me: Can I download it to the phone?

BB: No.

Me: Can I download it to my computer?

BB: No.

Me: Is there a Japanese input pack?

BB: Yes.

Me: Can I get that input pack?

BB: No.

Me: But it exists?

BB: Yes.

Me: Why can’t I get it?

BB: Because your carrier doesn’t support it.

Me: But you make it?

BB: Yes.

Me: Can’t I just get it from you?

BB: No, your carrier doesn’t support it.

Me: OK. Where do I download updates to my system software? From the carrier?

BB: No. From me.

Me: So you have the Japanese input pack?

BB: Yes.

Me: But you just said I can’t get it from you.

BB: No, I said your carrier doesn’t support it.

Me: So I can get it from you?

BB: No.

Me: Do you sell the Blackberry Bold in Japan?

BB: Yes.

Me: Does it come with the Japanese input pack installed?

BB: Of course.

Me: Could I download the Japanese system software?

BB: No, you’re in Australia.

Me: But I can type in Chinese?

BB: Yes, there are a lot of Chinese people in Australia.

Me: How will you know if I download the Japanese system software?

BB: There’s a file.

Me: What if I delete that file?

BB: Well… you could do that. But that’s not supported. Who knows what could happen?

Me: Don’t you know?

BB: Maybe.

Me: Will you tell me?

BB: Mmmm… no.

Me: But you make the software!

BB: For Japan.

Me: What difference does it make whether I’m in Japan or Australia?

BB: All the difference.

Me: Look, what I want to be able to do is to type in Japanese on my Blackberry.

BB: *slowly* I understand.

Me: I am not a crazy person!

BB: Of course.

Me: JUST LET ME TYPE IN BLOODY JAPANESE!

BB: Have you tried Chinese? Chinese is like Japanese.

Me: CHINESE IS NOT LIKE JAPANESE!

BB: Thai? All those funny squiggles. Who knows what the fuck that means.

Me: AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

BB: Korean?