On Being a Hypocrite

I care about the environment. I use electricity like it’s going out of fashion. I’m concerned about the plight of the poor. I give nothing to charity. I think trade unions are important. I didn’t join one. I believe it’s difficult to morally justify the slaughter of animals for food when alternatives are available. I eat meat. I am a hypocrite.

To my mind there’s always been something fundamentally honest about the way some conservatives don’t seem to care about other people. Why pretend you’re doing otherwise when really it all comes down to looking after Number 1? I can’t do that. When I’m not ignoring the plight of others I’m feeling bad about it. While members of the NRA sleep easily at night (possibly with a gun under their pillow) I lay awake, wracked by guilt.

Not too wracked, of course. This absorbs my attention for all of about three minutes before sleep comes and claims me. What guilt there is isn’t enough to motivate me to, you know, do something. I’m not being actively nasty, I suppose. I don’t spit on the poor. Or vegans. And I feel for them in that way that doesn’t actually require….